Lovey

My youngest will be six years old on February 2.  Having a child after a confirmed diagnosis of autism in an older sibling is scary. So many questions go through your mind. Was there something I did in pregnancy the time before that caused it?  Did I not pay enough attention when they were an infant?  Is there something I can do this time to change it?  It makes you assess every little thing you do.  I know there is nothing I could have done differently in any of my pregnancies to have prevented two premature births and another child born with an autism spectrum disorder.  I believe that all of my children were perfectly made.  Just the way they are.

The story of "Lovey" is a tale of hope, security, love and laziness.  Not necessarily in that order.  My oldest daughter had a pink Precious Moments doll as a baby.  We actually had about 10 at one time because "Pinky" became her security blanket and heaven forbid one went missing.  Thirteen years later the original Pinky is still an integral part of her life. When Emily was born she did not form an attachment to any one thing.  There was no comfort item or security blanket.  The pacifier wasn't even that much of a help.  When my son was born I had the fleeting thought that maybe, just maybe, that was part of Emily's anxiety.  She didn't have a comfort item except for me.  I bought a supply of different lovies for my son to use in hopes that he might find security in one. 

He really did not show an intense interest in any of them.  However, I always made sure they were available.  Then one day when he was an infant it was time to eat.  Actually it was past time to eat.  Preparing the bottle I realized that I didn't have a burp rag.  I certainly didn't have the minute it would take for me to run upstairs to get one so I did what any desperate mom would do.  I grabbed a shirt off of the ever constant pile of laundry that was always on the couch thinking it was one of my husbands.  It was mine and by the time I realized it, there was no turning back.  It was a simple white cotton shirt that I had bought at Target, but one of the few "nicer" post pregnancy shirts I had.  Well since I had already used it, I just decided to use it as the burp rag of the day.  I washed it that night and low and behold bottle time the next day landed me in the same predicament.  And that white t shirt had ended up in the pile on the couch once again so I grabbed it. It ended up in the bed with him a few times that day and I noticed that he really liked holding it while he slept.  He also held on to it while I fed him.  I again washed the shirt at the end of the day and at this point decided the formula stains weren't worth getting out so it became one of the burp rags.  I am not sure at what point it became more of a lovey than a burp rag, but he loved it.  He needed it.  He wanted it.  Six years later, "Lovey" is full of holes.  He(so decided by my son on the gender) is always there at bedtime.  He is sometimes worn as a shirt because he is so comfortable. But most importantly he has given my son a feeling of security. 

 

Thanks for reading~

Jessica

 

"Here comes the rain again..."

The weather in Alabama has been crazy since December.  We have gone from 70 degree temps to 30 degree temps with tornado's in between.  As with many children who have special needs, weather has a huge impact on Emily's behavior and sensory needs.  It is as if she has a built in radar that detects significant changes in weather.  I rarely watch television so I typically do not stay abreast of weather forecasts, except for checking the upcoming weeks temperatures on my phone to pick out school clothes. 

Over the weekend, I noticed some changes with Emily.  After returning from an outing without her on Saturday, I found her in her room wearing a bathing suit.  She had gotten a few other items of clothing from her closet and had thrown them on the floor.  Thinking how odd it was that it was 30 degrees outside and she was in her bathing suit, it didn't completely shock me as it was raining outside.  I thought perhaps she associated the rain with water and swimming.  I again ran errands without her on Sunday and came home to find her wearing a sundress with fleece pajama pants.  There was not one article of clothing left hanging in her closet.  She had obviously tried some things on and then just put them back in her closet on the floor.  Curious as to why the sudden desire to try on and change clothes multiple times in a day, I had a fleeting thought that maybe she was having a fashion show just like any other typical little girl her age would do. 

Monday morning she cried because she didn't want to go to school.  Tuesday morning she complained of a neck ache, her throat hurting and foot ache.  She asked for her sensory bag, which we keep at school during the week, on the way home yesterday.  She wanted her sensory chewies.  She wanted me to warm her weighted neck pad up last night.  It took me 10 minutes to get her sock on just right this morning with more complaints of everything "hurt" her. 

It is raining today and temps are supposed to be up into the 70's for the next several days.  This has wreaked havoc on Emily's sensory processing disorder.  I am sure that there will be negative behaviors associated with this change in weather as well.  To all of my friends with special needs kids...

"Is it raining with you?"
(Annie Lennox)

Emily(far left) tasting the rain

Thanks for reading,
Jessica

A Rose in Winter

A Rose in Winter

As the year comes to a close I have found myself reflecting on the past.  While reflections often bring about feelings of nostalgia or joy for me, they rarely bring about a feeling of sadness.  However, I let myself fall into the trap of looking at life through something other than rose colored glasses.  I usually try to find the beauty or humor in every situation, yet I have been unable to do so in recent days.  Today, looking out my kitchen window, I saw one rose in bloom.  Just one single red rose on my three bushes.  It was as if God was redirecting me.  I saw it as a symbol, a reminder, for the way I want to live my life EVERYDAY.  A red rose on a cold and dark day when we are overcome with the challenges life throws our way. 

My New Year's wish for us all is that we find the beauty within ourselves and in every aspect of our lives.  That we stop to smell the roses when we get the chance and that we Praise God from whom all blessings flow.

 

 

 

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

 

Thanks for reading~

Jessica

Blessed

 

"It is more blessed to give than to receive."

Acts 20:35

 

I have always tried to live my life by this verse.  I have blogged about it before.  I have a passion for helping others and giving back.  It is not often that I am on the receiving end of gifts and always feel uncomfortable taking gifts. 

 

 

Earlier this summer I made a decision to step away from helping others for awhile and focus on taking care of my family.  Helping others had taken time away from the most important things in my life and that was my family.  I felt guilty about that.  I decided to get back to couponing.  Something that helped my family tremendously in the past and that I had neglected for almost a year. Over the course of the summer my grocery stockpile grew and my money saving increased.  However, I still

questioned my decisions and felt a sense of guilt for not being able to help everyone else.  It wasn't long until I saw what I had seen every other time.  HIS plan. My husband's job was at stake yet again. This would be the fourth time in four years that layoffs in his job field had created a change for us. The only option that made sense to us was for him to take a very significant cut in pay to be closer to home and with more job security.  I was so thankful to have the tools I needed to continue to save money.  However, I knew that it would not be without struggle and much sacrifice.  

 

In the past few weeks I have been shown that God does supply our needs. Through faith and amazing friends I am blown away by the generous and kind giving of others.  Today when I got home I was SURPRISED to find a wireless printer sitting on my front door.  This may not seem like much to anyone else, but this gift will help tremendously in helping me save money.  I use my phone as a computer 99% of the time and am unable to print coupons from my phone or Emily's ipad.  Extra coupons mean saving extra money.

 

I was just thinking earlier that we would not be able to help needy families in the capacity in which we have in Christmases past.  In giving back, I will pay it forward and use my gift of getting free food at the grocery store with my coupons to families this year. 

 

I found this idea on Pinterest a while back.  Blessing bags: http://pinterest.com/pin/137711701075381561/

I intend to keep giving as much as I possibly can.

 

I am also still fully committed to giving Scentsy Buddies to kids with autism by selling Scentsy. I have been blessed with an abundance of orders recently that helped me send 16 buddies out. 

 

I am blessed beyond measure!

 

 

Thanks for reading,

Jessica

 

To my friends for the support~ I love you!



3-8-1 Candles Review

A while back a facebook friend asked me to write a review for a candle.  She was willing to gift me this candle in exchange for a review.  This was not just ANY candle mind you, it contained a piece of jewelry inside.  I had some reservations about it, as I am a Scentsy Consultant(wick less scented wax), and haven't bought an actual candle in over a year.  However, as the parent of 3 children, I do love the rare indulgence of a candle lit bubble bath.  Unfortunately since I had not bought a candle in quite a while I had been forced to use those candles you get at the Dollar Tree that are merely for decorative purposes to relax in the tub. 

 

When Lori Dean gifted me the candle, I got to choose any scent from the collection.  There were over 30 scents to choose from and while I was really wanting the Banana Nut Bread, I opted for something more relaxing for my bath time. Cucumber Mint.  I received the candle a few weeks later in the mail.  The packaging was simple, but the candle was well protected.  This was a 22 oz candle in a square jar.  It was HEAVY!  Upon opening it, I was immediately impressed with the overall look and design.  There were two wicks and a bit of glitter on the top.  The design of the label on the jar was very elegant.  I also received a sample of the pumpkin souffle scent tart which was an added bonus.

22oz Jar Candle $30.99


I immediately lit the candle like a kid at Christmas.  Forget bath time, I was eager to smell the cucumber mint right then.  In no time at all, my house was smelling lovely.  I burned the candle for a few hours a day over the course of the next few weeks.  One of the first things I noticed was how even the candle burned.  This was not a cheap candle where you had to dig the wick out of the wax to light it up.  After each burning session the wax leveled out and looked brand new, minus a few inches of wax. 

In all of my excitement and enjoyment over my new candle, I actually forgot there was a piece of jewelry inside the candle that was valued anywhere from $39.99- $1000!  As the candle burned lower and lower, I became increasingly skeptical of any jewelry being in there.  First off, I had no idea how it would survive the heat.  I also saw no evidence of a box or anything inside underneath the wax.  My kids were also growing more impatient with every passing day.  Note to self, never tell your kids there is a surprise inside ANYTHING.  Then we saw it!  It was a little ball of aluminum foil.  So that's how it survives the heat.  I eagerly got a spoon out while the candle was still burning and lifted the foil out.  When the wax hardened, I unwrapped the foil to find the prettiest ring.  Black spinel and diamonds set in .925 sterling silver with a value of $160!!

 

3-8-1 Candles offer a variety scents for their products.  Currently there are 22 oz jar candles that include jewelry, 14 oz jar candles that include jewelry, 14 oz jar candles without jewelry and Jewelry Tarts. There are also some combine and save options as well as gift certificates available.  You can follow 3-8-1 Candles on Facebook or visit their website 3-8-1 Candles.

 

 

  With Christmas upon us, please keep 3-8-1 Candles in mind for your gift giving.  A portion of sales from 3-8-1 Candles goes to support Lyme Disease Awareness. I highly recommend 3-8-1 Candles!

 

Thanks for reading~

Jessica

 

 

 

 

 

It's too loud!

October is National Sensory Awareness month.  Almost 1 in 20 individuals are affected by Sensory Processing Disorder(SPD).  Those with autism or aspergers are at increased risk of having SPD.

Noise is a common issue for many people on the spectrum.  Many everyday sounds that most of us take for granted, cause children with ASD to retreat, hold their ears, scream, or tantrum.  The sound of a bee buzzing makes my daughter hold her ears.  She is verbal and has told me many times that bumble bees are too loud.  She dislikes the sound of the hair dryer.  Bath time routines have always been difficult.   I would have to chase her and practically hold her down when she was younger to dry her hair.  Over the past 10 years she has become somewhat desensitized, however she still holds her ears.  She can pick up conversations from another room.   She has a difficult time concentrating if there are too many noises going on at once.  Rain on the car roof is often too noisy for her.

 

There are many factors to consider when dealing with an individual who has SPD.  We can't control the environment so it makes everyday situations like going to the store or school extremely challenging.  Do we force the individual into an environment that we know is going to create stress and anxiety because of noise?  Do we hope that eventually the exposure will desensitize them?  Do we avoid those situations at all costs to make it easier for them?  For me personally, I have not had the choice of avoiding very many situations that cause stress and anxiety because of SPD for Emily.  She is forced to attend recitals, ball games, and shopping since I have no one to leave her with.  There are times where it is easier than others.  I will say that as she has matured the severity of the consequences of her SPD have lessened.  I am not sure if it is the exposure, or her ability to control her own reactions better, that has made this possible.  I can definitely tell a difference. 

 

I came across a video the other day that gives some insight as to what auditory stimuli is like for someone on the spectrum.  I found it extremely helpful for me in understanding just how SPD affects Emily.  Please listen to this video and put yourself in the shoes of a child on the spectrum who has a hard time regulating their emotions as well as processing noise...What Autism Feels Like 

 

Thanks for reading~

Jessica

National Sensory Awareness Month

October is National Sensory Awareness Month.  SPD(sensory processing disorder) affects almost one in twenty people.  Individuals with autism or aspergers are at a higher risk of being affected by SPD. 

I first learned about Sensory Processing Disorder 12 years ago after my first child was born 3 months prematurely. At 18 months of age she was diagnosed with SPD.  She refused to touch certain objects and refused to eat certain foods based on the texture.  I was directed to a book called the The Out-of-Sync-Child by Carol Kranowitz.  The SPD spectrum is extremely broad, and as I read it, I only concentrated on the areas that my daughter had trouble with.  She received occupational therapy, as do most children who have a diagnosis of SPD.  We were very fortunate that she outgrew all of her sensory issues by the time she was 5.  When Emily was born, she was completely different from Anna Grace and I assumed it was because she was a full term baby.  She put everything in her mouth, smelled anything and was sensitive to sound and sights.  It never occurred to me that she too suffered from SPD and was just on the opposite end of the sensory spectrum from her sister.  It was not until she was diagnosed with an autism spectrum disorder at the age of 3 that we discovered she had SPD.

Emily with her Scentsy Buddy

For Emily, SPD has been chronic and debilitating at times.  Over a year ago I decided to help those who have sensory issues like Emily, by selling Scentsy and using my profits to give Scentsy Buddies to kids with autism for free.   You can read about it in this blog post, http://somewhereoverthespectrum-jessica.blogspot.com/2011/08/if-i-only-had-heartpart-2.html.

As a way of bringing awareness to SPD, I am giving away ANY item(up to $35) to one person from the Scentsy Fall/Winter catalog which can be viewed online at my Scentsy website. I will announce the winner on October 10th and you will have 48 hours to give me your order.  You can use this opportunity to get something for your own senses or someone you know.  Right now there is a special offer of Buy one Buddy get one free. These make excellent gifts for any child on your list.

Good Luck and Thanks for reading~
Jessica
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